26 Comments
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Dawn ~ The Happy Farmwife's avatar

I love your honesty here. My daughter felt much the same way, she was very hurt by a couple girls she thought as friends while in youth group . As the girls matured they changed in ways she wanted nothing to do with , she was never part of the boy crazy crew , she wasn’t a party girl , she no longer fit in so they all dumped her. Was very hard as a mom to watch her be hurt like this. Sadly she left youth group. But in place of those friendships, she grew a deeper friendship with Jesus and he blessed her with a wonderful boyfriend , now her husband . Her first love is now her husband and they are Jesus followers together , were baptized together and serve Jesus together.

Chloe 💗's avatar

That’s so beautiful. It gives me hope! I think your daughter and I are very similar. And that’s how a lot of the girls at the youth group were - boy crazy, loud, wild. I’m so glad that I didn’t change myself to fit in with them. I totally believe that the Lord reaches us in different ways, and for me, youth group just wasn’t it.

Thanks so much for reading! 💗🫶🏼

Leora Esmé's avatar

Thank you for highlighting this topic. As an introvert, I've struggled with this too. Like you said, it's not for everyone because we are all different and we can each find our own unique ways of growing in our faith.

Chloe 💗's avatar

I’m so glad you resonated with this, and I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one. Thank you for reading. 🤗🩷

Sophhh🌻's avatar

Super well said!! As an introvert, I totally know how you feel <333

Chloe 💗's avatar

Thank you Soph! I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one. Thank you for reading! 🫶🏼💗

Kevin @ The Quiet Center's avatar

i really respect this. there’s something quietly brave about realizing you were never wrong for being quieter, deeper, or drawn to a different kind of fellowship than the room seemed built to honor

it makes me think some people carry an older soul before they have older years, and that can feel lonely until you find the people who know how to receive it. honestly, girls and guys alike would be lucky to have someone like you beside them, who would rather seek wisdom over coffee than shrink herself to fit a louder room

Chloe 💗's avatar

Thank you so much for the kind words, Kevin. Thank you for reading. 😊

For God Alone's avatar

This is something I've wondered about too... like shouldn't youth group be something to enjoy? But yes, who said we teens had to be besties with a lot of other teens we may not feel connected with?

I love my adult friends so much and will never regret spending time with them!

Thanks for your honesty and encouragement, Chloe!💕

Chloe 💗's avatar

Yes, you’re so right! And I love mine too! Time spent talking with them is never a waste.

Thank you for reading and commenting! 🫶🏼💗

Nicole Roth, Joy Coach's avatar

Oh my goodness, I can relate to so much of this. I am so glad that you’re able to see your young age that there’s not something “wrong with you.” because you happen to be maybe an old soul who likes good conversation about deep meaningful things. That’s amazing!! I was definitely that girl as well. I always felt like a wallflower and like I didn’t really fit. That was long before social media so I can’t even imagine all the pressure now.

I’m also glad that your recognizing the strange focus on it being a huge “party”. The Pastor we had before ours now always said that the way you bring people in is the way you have to keep them and I think because our culture is so addicted too fast and new and fun and fresh, the church is trying desperately to fit, which should not be the case.

Good for you for being your own person and I for one am thrilled that you’re here! I’ll have a coffee date with you anytime. 💕🌺🎉🙌

Chloe 💗's avatar

I’m so glad that it resonated with you! I am definitely and old soul, which I love but it took me a while to realize that. It makes me feel better that I’m not the only one who feels like that!

Ah, yes, my family and I have said the same thing. Churches, especially youth groups, try so hard to gain a following and a crowd that they don’t disciple the one that they do have. I feel this is why there is so much worldliness within the church - there’s too much outreach and not enough discipleship. Of course, outreach is so extremely important, and it is what we are called to do, but not more than discipling and strengthening the believers that the church does have.

Aww thank you! And thanks so much for reading and commenting, it means a lot! 💗💐✨🫶🏼

Nicole Roth, Joy Coach's avatar

Yesss!!! All of this!!! I feel that what I’m called to create with the five courses that I am creating is a discipleship program of sorts and I’m so excited to see what God does with it. So needed!!!!

Chloe 💗's avatar

Aww that’s amazing!!! I’ve seen some of the testimonials of those who have joined your Zoom meets, it’s so amazing what God is doing! I’d love to join one at some point! 💗

Nicole Roth, Joy Coach's avatar

I would absolutely love to have you my dear! I’m going to be out of town and then we have our in person retreat, but definitely after that I will start them up again!

Chloe 💗's avatar

Yay! Looking forward to it! Safe travels!!

Nicole Roth, Joy Coach's avatar

Thank you!!! Lake Tahoe here we come!!

DiscipleChick's avatar

Your transparency is both beautiful and refreshing, Chloe. Each of my 3 kiddos had their own struggles with youth group when they were your age. None of them did shallow well and they have all grown into wise, thoughtful, friendly, and caring adults who take the lead in reaching out and in loving others. Thankfully, each of them is close to the Lord, too. -We learn so many lessons through our struggles and trials. Sounds like yours have not been wasted either. Praise the Lord!

Chloe 💗's avatar

Ah, it feels so good to know that it’s not just me. Youth group is definitely a challenge if you don’t fit that culture, unfortunately. Thank you so much for the kind words and for reading! 💗🫶🏼

Faith Is Believing's avatar

Chloe, I genuinely love how honest you are. Not just on this platform but how honest you are with yourself. You are protected by God and His angels. He has given you a beautiful gift of discernment. Spiritual warfare is very real. It is also in the church. At times you will feel lonely but always remember, John 17: 14-17. “I have given them thy word; and the world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I pray not that thou shouldest take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil. They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.

We do have to live in the world but we do not have to be apart of it. Especially in the ways of so many.

Girl, you keep walking with Jesus. You’re a leader regardless of what it feels like at times. Continue to show the light of Jesus. You may think they don’t see you, but they do. Jesus is leading and guiding you. 🤍🙏. Stand tall and be proud of yourself! 🤍

Chloe 💗's avatar

Aww thank you for the encouragement! 🥹💗

Sofia 🧸's avatar

Chloe! Thank you for writing this, I thought I was the only one that felt this way. I had a very similar struggle trying to fit in with the youth group at my church, and I thought if I stopped going, I wouldn’t be that “good” of a Christian. It’s not for everyone and that’s ok!! 🫶🏼

Chloe 💗's avatar

Awww Sofia I’m so glad this resonated with you!!! I was hesitant to even post this article, but I’m so glad I did. It feels really good knowing I’m not the only one who feels this way. Thank you for reading! 🥹💗

Jack's avatar

I totally understand what you mean, I’ve always been the quieter one who tries to put themselves out there, and even in many churches as an adult post college it can be a challenge. But God always answers my prayers for community and ways to engage with my local church

Chloe 💗's avatar

I’m glad to hear that you feel the same way. It’s a challenge, but you’re right, God is faithful and gives us beautiful communities. Thank you for reading, Jack!